Tracks

01. I Can Not Be Saved
02. Unhallowed Be Thy Shame
03. This Is Not An Exit
04. Unwill
05. Autumn Leaves
06. Memorial



01. I Can Not Be Saved

From the realm of my contorted soul
Where does a body end?
I don't know but I can't find the strength to carry on, I can't find my way
So if what you say is true, I'll find what I need in you
Never despair and you'll be saved
But not today

If you'll take the bait, I'll play your selfish game so vile and profane
If I give myself to you, your path of shame
I curse your name
Your salvation is not mine
My destiny, death will refine
For, it's enough to comfort me, the eternal sleep
Away from

Your shimmering light
Burning inside so cold and bright
In hopes I will die without you as my guide
Away from the light

I cannot be saved
From your pale masquerade
And the part that you play
And if you just take my hand
I'll make you understand
And you'll forever be saved

Your shimmering light
Burning so bright
Burning inside
In hopes I will die satisfied

Where will I go?
How will I know?
When will I go?


02. Unhallowed Be Thy Shame

The claims of the living on behalf of the dead
In the clasping of hands, holding on to your breath
With every breath a lie a lie as cold as a death
Proffered kisses and faded flowers
Grazing your lips and bonds as ours
With every word you speak
Your request, my command

Treat me as if I am no one, nothing
Not born at all
Inevitable, I will keep crawling back to you
I'm bound to fall

I will fall into oblivion
I've given all and now I'm broken down and bruised and battered
Torn and tattered weakened by your beauty
That I can't overcome and I am still bleeding

Hiding behind your veil of empty promises
On broken vows on behalf of the blind
You reclaim your innocence and guilt now binds us together
Forever and ever

Unhallowed be thy shame
With shallow words and hollow eyes
I have given all that's left to give to you
And taken only the suffering you've shown and the damage done that you've left behind

Hate, detest, abhor
All the things that you adore
Disfavor, despise
Harvesting such lucid lies

Loathing the empyrean corners that surround my body
And keep me intertwined against the cold hard beatin of your heart
I shall remain a disciple, a giver, never a receiver of truth or forgiveness
Because I am not worthy
I am not worthy of feeling love, or the pleasant gesture of a smile
Only revealing the damage that you've caused

Unhallowed be thy shame
With shallow words and hollow eyes
I have given all that's left to give to you, and taken only the suffering you've shown, and the damage done that you left behind


03. This Is Not An Exit

Post dramatic/enigmatic trauma
Here we go again
Every day's the same, oh how I dread beginnings
Still awaiting my, still awaiting my end

Alone and distraught/here I lay
Slightly fevered from today
Cannot bare what they say
Self loathing, I'll fade away

Just leave me lying here
I'll close my eyes, escape this life and sleep to pass the time

Oh how I miss the days...were golden
But now deprived
Pondering the question
Why the fuck are we alive?
Growing older now, My skies turn to gray
If killing is a sin, then I can't win and all hope is lost

An act to seal my fate
I can't, I am afraid to inflict the pain, to create my own demise
Oh please, release me from the pain of living

Beyond comprehension
Victim of circumstance
Lost with no direction
I can't face the day again

The hole that I have made
The fear that it creates
To know that I can't go on
But I don't have the guts to end it all
Oh please, release me from this never ending hell

And I dream a thousand years astray
Just close my eyes and wish to die and never see again
When I wake there shall be no today
Only deaden eyes that welcome me away into obscurity

Release me
Help me find the door that will open
Release me

Slipping away again
Struggling to find my way...the light that I can't find
Will pain subside


04. Unwill

I've tried to find myself, but I can't
To find some peace of mind or what's left
Life seems so meaningless
Sometimes, I just want to give in

As the sorrow calls my name
She comforts me and leaves the scar of pain and tells me everything will be alright
But I know damn well, that's a lie

Take this day, no different than the others
But I know I cannot stay
Far and away
I'll try not to remember
Still, I remember everything

I am unwilling, I am unable
I see no hope at all
With all I've given
I can not carry on

Is this forever?
A foul endeavor
Or a veil which I've disclosed

I taste of tragedy and divine
Sweet pathetic comedy, and in time you'll get the best of me, and my mind but it's so insignificant

Will things get better?
In pieces, shattered
Within the lonely corners that the shadows know

It's now or never
No need for reverence
I've paid my debts in full

Things will not get better
I am in pieces, shattered
Slipping into the darkest corner of my mind

Just let me go
Escape from reality
Please don't remember me
I am not worthy of a memory


05. Autumn Leaves

Autumn leaves me with your presence
Your pale and graven resemblance and all the steps that I've followed
Still I'm left to carry the load

A bitter dream that I've left behind
In the still, stillness of water
From the milestones I've left to climb
followed by your laughter


06. Memorial

Autumn leaves and winter brings
Back dead things that I've tried to hide
All alone, oh how do I feel?
Only regret, guilt and shame

Nobody's fault but my own
So I have to face it
Try as I may, the pain stays, and I can't erase it

Hold me, in your arms now
Save me, this time around
Hold me, In your arms now
As in my dreams, I hear you scream

These things, they pick away at my mind that brings the pain
Times since passe, I've tried to erase
Such tragedy torments my weak mind

Nobody's fault but my own
So I have to face it
Try as I may, the pain remains
And I can't take it

A child of your embrace
An empty trail of tears
Upon fallen leaves
Will tomorrow bring

And in my dreams I hear you laughing, laughing at me

What we dream and what we see
Forgotten and what used to be
Two indifferent things but never promising, and to you I do confide

I beg of you please forgive me

This child of your embrace
An empty trail of tears
Beyond broken dreams
Will tomorrow be