Staring at the ceiling with dying eyes
Morphine recieving most of the pain
Still it hurts I have to cry
Thinking of my life and all its stains

I hope I can walk onto the pearly gates
God granting me salvation
I have to reconcile with a long lost faith
Don't want to die in a state of desolation
Please God forgive me for my sins
Longing for redemption before the afterlife begins
I regret all wrongdoings from my past
A clear conscience is all I ask

My life's been miserable, others I gave hell
This illnes seems to be my punishment
I don't wish for a disgaceful farewell
I repent my past and want a shameless end

Forgive me Father for I have sinned
I have no clue where to begin
Overwhelmed by the situation I am in
At my wits end, I'm almost floored
I'm sorry I have never confessed before
Please help me before I close life's door

Mixed feelings about what we had and what could have been
Never thought there would come a time you would leave
Thinking back I probably was too blind to see
You were daceptive with tricks up your sleeve

Things were all fine or so it seemed
Your fake stories made my heart bleed
You could have been honest and tell me we were done
That would be something I could overcome
You decided to follow a different path
By telling lies that gave me fellings of wrath
You would rather spent time with some other
With being honest you couldn't be bothered

Leaving notes that said you would end it all
That really hurt and made me feel appalled
I took it hard 'cause I still had feelings
In the end that took a lot of healing

In hindsight I'm glad life took this turn
I would have given love you couldn't return
Looking back there were times of joy
Those memories I don't want to destroy
I hope you're content the way you are
I'm glad we parted without fighting a war
It's all over now, we're part of history
All that's left, bittersweet memories

Mixed feelings about what we had and what could have been
Never thought there would come a time you would leave
Thinking back I probably was too blind to see
Your deception is my bittersweet memory

Bloodsoaked the limbs of body
Slashed from a thousand cuts
Ripped and slaughtered I fall
Arteries opened wide
Lacerated
Vortex whirling
My skin, my arms, my face, my eyes
A living dissection

Slice lacerate
Cut out my guilt
Paint, engrave
The signs that do reveal
Carved, written on
The canvas of my skin

A million razors of glass
A wall of stainglass bullets
Raging through the air cutting through my flesh
In violent burning winds
Cyclone hailing death

With flesh split wide open
With fibres torn apart
The winds are cold but burning
Here I fall

Silence fills the air
Voices whispering in guilt
Dead, godless and alone
The winds rise anew

Verdict to castigate
The cycle never ends
Peace is absent here and so is grace
Churning torment
Into ash dissolve
Storms of shards raging through the void
Endlessly

Endlessly

Born of the mire
Just columns of flesh
Bent, afflicted
In fear
Dead in themselves
Mere empty shells
Unseen, unwanted

Slowly marching
A rotten trail
Along the ropes
To strangle them
I stand afar
I watch them crawl
Into the hallways of the abattoir

Mute
Joyless
Emaciated
Dead

What is God
Just a thought
A wish
A principle
Sarcastic

Where no light shines
Beneath the widow weeds
In moors with soggy ground
They sink

They shall not breathe
The shall not scream
The slaves of the mill
Dying, worthless
Within the corridors
Of the slaughterhouse

What does not live can have no voice