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Leaving a band



Posts: 5   Visited by: 31 users
25.03.2011 - 23:30
MetalSpider

I don't know if this truly warrants a thread, but I got to do it anyways lol.

Have you ever left a band because you just didn't feel motivated enough or were just lacking interest in performing live or just lacking interest in being in a band?

Ive been with my band since about 2004-2005. I'm the drummer. In the beginning it wasn't very serious. We would just write songs and try new things, but we only did it for the sake of playing music and for fun. Eventually we wanted more out of it. So we started really writing some songs and fixing up existing songs and putting our own album together. Eventually we started recording and playing shows (mainly stupid competitions, which we won a few...and not necessarily because of our music, but because of the number of tickets we sold). We did this for a few years. We recorded an album, made about 25 copies (all we could afford at the time I suppose...I can't remember lol) as well as T-Shirts. We didn't sell much at all, but we only tried about once or twice, before it was decided by the bassist/lead singer and the guitarist (great guy, but he goes along with whatever lol) that the CD wasn't good enough. But we do have a song on iTunes...I don't know how much it sold though lol.

We eventually got tired of playing these useless contests and seeing nothing come of it. And by this time, I myself was just slowly becoming de-motivated and was losing interest in playing with the band. We took a month break I think, before we decided to start playing again and re-working some songs. Our last show ended up being a competition type show at the bass players University. The show didnt go too well. We came in last because we had sound problems and what not, but one of the judges, who is the owner of a studio, was impressed with us and wanted to record us. But I still was losing interest and I let the band know. They managed to convince me to go for one last push. I agreed and said fine lets do this.

So we went to this guy's studio and did a proper recording for an EP. The EP consisted of 4 songs we mainly had on our previous album and 1 new one. This was last year pretty much. But this whole time I've still been struggling internally, trying to maintain interest. Well now the 2 guys want to push to sell our EP's (we made a 1000 of them by the way...I personally don't think we'll sell them all, but I guess thats where live shows come in). We have 2 shows coming up...one on April 1st, and another on April 30th. Well thats great for the band, but I think now I've personally reached the point where I've just run out of steam. I have no interest in really playing these shows. I don't even have interest in practicing with my band. I'm just not motivated to do it...I try and avoid practices by saying im busy, or I dont have access to the car or whatever. But I would never just not show up or ignore calls or whatever. Either way, its just not in me anymore. I don't know if its just a matter of taking a long break (and we've had times were we would practice for a month or 2 if I remember correctly) or if its just other life issues, but I think Im out of energy.

Now these guys have been two of my greatest friends since high school. And I'd like to keep it that way, since we all hang out with the same group of people for the most part. Guess I just got to tell my band that I can't do it anymore. The thing is, they won't find another drummer. They say it won't be the same band without me. They'll have to go a different route. I personally don't believe that but hey...im honoured I guess.

I just don't know how to go about it. I just don't want to do it anymore. I'll do this April 1st show, but I dont even want to do the April 30th one...even though our friends band is also playing.

Anyways...I think I have an idea of what to say and how to go about it. But Im welcome and open to ways of going about it. If anyone else has been in my situation, then share with me. Hell maybe I just needed to write all this down...get it off my chest.

and now as I write this, they're calling me lol!
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26.03.2011 - 06:15
MetalSpider

I told them...and they understood haha. I guess I was just anticipating "trouble" with this whole situation.
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28.03.2011 - 12:39
Yasmine

Written by MetalSpider on 26.03.2011 at 06:15

I told them...and they understood haha. I guess I was just anticipating "trouble" with this whole situation.


So now that you're free you can record some tracks for me right?! HAHA. Glad it went well for you.
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"Both optimists and pessimists contribute to our society. The optimist invents the airplane and the pessimist the parachute." G B Stern
"Society is like a stew. If you don't stir it up every once in a while then a layer of scum float u
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28.03.2011 - 19:20
MetalSpider

Written by Yasmine on 28.03.2011 at 12:39

Written by MetalSpider on 26.03.2011 at 06:15

I told them...and they understood haha. I guess I was just anticipating "trouble" with this whole situation.


So now that you're free you can record some tracks for me right?! HAHA. Glad it went well for you.


Haha...we'll see .....I might actually take a break from playing drums. Plus I live in a condo, so my drums have nowhere to go, unless I sell them or keep them in storage (or maybe my bass player will still keep them in his place if he wants. No idea yet. Im playing 2-3 more shows with them and thats it I think.

and thanks Im glad it went well too.
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07.05.2011 - 15:12
Archetype

Thread may be a little stale but I don't care.

Although I've never been the one to leave, we've had people leave due to musical differences. I respect the fact that you've thought things through and you let your band know your thoughts clearly and where you stand with it all.

The last time we had a guy leave, I ended up finding out the day after a very decent and normal recording session from not the guy himself but from our bassist. Came as a complete surprise.

People these days...
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