Band:	Fvneral Fvkk
Album:	Carnal Confessions
Style:	Epic doom metal
Release date:	September 2019

01. Omnia Ad Dei Gloriam
02. Chapel Of Abuse
03. A Shadow In The Dormitory
04. Alone With The Cross
05. The Hallowed Leech
06. Poor Sisters Of Nazareth
07. To Those In The Grave
08. When God Is Not Watching

Epic doom metal is making quite a comeback in 2019 and Fvneral Fvkk's debut has arrived to further support this observation. Featuring members of Ophis, Fäulnis and Voidhaven, they have chosen apt pseudonyms to accentuate their sardonic mission statement.

When I first came across the name of this four-piece from Hamburg, I wasn't sure what to make of it. It didn't strike me as a very successful choice, but listening to the album more and more and reading the disturbing lyrics (that are mostly based on true events), I became convinced that it does sarcastically describe the idea behind the band, which is the appalling phenomenon of sex abuse and other heinous crimes that have been committed in God's name.

Musically, Fvneral Fvkk do everything right; they take the doomiest out of Solitude Aeturnus, Woods Of Ypres, and My Dying Bride and deliver a sad, disconcerting and filler-free album. Carnal Confessions is generally not faster than your grandmother's walking pace when she goes to church to pray, and to the inexperienced listener the lack of significant change in tempo and rhythm may come across as monotonous and repetitive upon first listen.

However, the songwriting brilliance and the exceptional performances in this record make it one of the standout debuts of the year. The way Fvneral Fvkk build their songs upon heavy riffs and adorn them with wailing melodies that send chills down your spine is exquisite. The baritone vocals of Cantor Cinaedicus are flawless and the addition of ecclesiastical chanting makes the album feel like it was recorded in a cathedral. The rhythm section sounds like raping nails being hammered on the coffin of innocence and the whole atmosphere of the album is mournful and sinister, like a lamenting soundtrack being played when the evil side of the human nature buries any form of purity and virtuousness by engaging in molesting activities. The production is clean without being too polished and brings out everything there is to enjoy about the instruments and the impeccable vocals.

Fvneral Fvkk are cynically presenting a harrowing subject around which their crushing and melancholic music revolves, both on their previous EP and on this debut full-length. "The dirtier your bible, the cleaner your soul", the band preaches, so join the Church of Holy Fvkk right here and spread its gospel.

"The statues
Of all the holy saints
The carpets
With those treacherous stains
They witness
Oh, the stories they'd tell
His blessings -
An altar boy's hell"