Rating:
2.3
iwrestledabearonce - Ruining It For Everybody
26 July 2011


01. Next Visible Delicious
02. You Know That Ain't Them Dogs' Real Voices
03. Deodorant Can't Fix Ugly
04. This Head Music Makes My Eyes Rain
05. It Is "Bro" Isn't It?
06. Gold Jacket, Green Jacket
07. Break It Down Camacho
08. Stay to the Right
09. I'm Gonna Shoot
10. Karate Nipples
11. Button It Up


A very unsettling fact had just crossed my mind. While I was too busy masturbating to enjoying all the great black metal this year and giving my reviewing attention to it, I failed to notice how positive my reviews have been as of late. If that trend were to be kept up, I might even loose credibility as a reviewer and my regular readers (all 3 of them) would surely think I've gone soft. I will have none of it, no sir. Time to turn my "JERK" switch on and give this turd of an album a piece of my mind.

Never in my reviewing career have I encountered something that gave me such joy to openly bash, something that gave me absolutely no way to justify its existence. Even in the most abhorrent rejected abortions that someone had the nerve to call "albums" I do my best, I really do, to find something redeemable. Ruining It For Everybody persistently refuses to present such a trait, instead choosing to stack one layer of shit upon another during its duration.

I don't know at what point did someone think that adding up metalcore/deathcore with a splash of grindcore and some cyber-electronica would be a good idea. It may sound promising in theory, but in practice, it's anything but. Random riffs, random breakdowns, a slaughtered pig for growling/screaming vocals and annoying, talentless moaning for clean "singing". Basically, the blueprint for every track is the same, although it may take quite a while for the listener to figure it out, seeing as how the whole thing sounds messier and more unorganized than a bunch of unsupervised preschool kids on a field-trip. Some grinding riffs that drown in downright awful screams/growls (I swear they have to be some of the worst I've ever heard) get interrupted by a tough-guy-bashing-his-chest breakdown, which in turn just ends up being abruptly ended itself, and by slow electronic passages with clean singing moaning and whining. Whether the reason behind this is either zero songwriting skills or an attempt to cram too much content into too little space, the album sounds as if everyone in the band plays on a private gig of his/her own, not giving a fuck about the rest of the band or how it all sounds mashed together. Take my word for it, iwrestledabearonce, you can't go from grindcore to metalcore to electronic pop in just two and a half minutes without sounding like a bunch of schizophrenics that got their hands on some instruments. It certainly doesn't help that, even taken at base value, every separate element is sorely lacking, from the yawn-inducing breakdowns to the completely idiotic riffs and vocals.

I'd recommend avoiding crappy albums, but you absolutely must hear this one. Then you can think about it next time you decide to call some other album bad. I gave this +0.3 in the rating because of the semi-tolerable "This Head Music Makes My Eyes Rain".

Performance: 5
Songwriting: 2
Originality: 7
Production: 8


Band profile: iwrestledabearonce
Album: Ruining It For Everybody


 


written by Slayer666 | 25.12.2011


Guest review disclaimer:
This is a guest review, which means it does not necessarily represent the point of view of the MS Staff.



Comments

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Milena - 25.12.2011 at 14:21  
05. It Is "Bro" Isn't It?

On MS it's BOR.
Mr. Doctor - 25.12.2011 at 14:34  
Gave it a 3 because I would do the girl and the song This Head Music Makes My Eyes Rain was okayish in the beginning.
Troy Killjoy - 25.12.2011 at 20:29  
Written by Milena on 25.12.2011 at 14:21
On MS it's BOR.

Because we're fucking hipsters.

Mr. Doctor - 25.12.2011 at 20:49  
Written by Troy Killjoy on 25.12.2011 at 20:29
Because we're fucking hipsters.

I really hope that you just created that pic right now because if not then it means that there ARE people that say "Bor" instead of "Bro" and that's just awful.
Troy Killjoy - 25.12.2011 at 20:53  
Written by Mr. Doctor on 25.12.2011 at 20:49
and that's just awful.

Cool story bor.
Mr. Doctor - 25.12.2011 at 20:57  
Written by Troy Killjoy on 25.12.2011 at 20:53

Written by Mr. Doctor on 25.12.2011 at 20:49
and that's just awful.

Cool story bor.


Urgh... >___<
Slayer666 - 26.12.2011 at 15:27  
And here I thought folks from MS were hipster for using BOR. Turns out, even BOR became mainstream.
Boxcar Willy - 01.01.2012 at 15:35  
I lol'd very hard^^^


nice preschool reference, i also have an utter distain for this alnum.

1.2/10
JD - 09.01.2012 at 20:20  
Written by Mr. Doctor on 25.12.2011 at 20:49

I really hope that you just created that pic right now because if not then it means that there ARE people that say "Bor" instead of "Bro" and that's just awful.


Nope Troy took that meme from our FB page(yes we do have one )

And we use BOR because:





Quote:
While I was too busy masturbating


On topic: nice review.
Void Eater - 10.01.2012 at 00:02  
Gees bor, it's not that bad... I find this band to be one of the better mainstream -core bands, mainly because they actually sound different. It may be a random assortment of ideas thrown in a blender and regurgitated out, to use an overused metaphor, but the parts that are being barfed out are pretty good.
Mr. Doctor - 10.01.2012 at 00:44  
Written by Void Eater on 10.01.2012 at 00:02

Gees bor, it's not that bad... I find this band to be one of the better mainstream -core bands, mainly because they actually sound different. It may be a random assortment of ideas thrown in a blender and regurgitated out, to use an overused metaphor, but the parts that are being barfed out are pretty good.




They only get points for having a girl that is ok to bang, nothing else, every single bit a different genre they throw at you is done bad, they aren't good in any genre let alone at blending them.
Slayer666 - 10.01.2012 at 01:32  
Written by JD on 09.01.2012 at 20:20

Quote:
While I was too busy masturbating


On topic: nice review.


Thanks man, I knew that snark would interest someone.

@Void
Tastes and all that, but I firmly believe that for every person that likes this, Satan kills a kitten.
demonsarising - 24.06.2012 at 16:05  
I can see why you all hated this album. Its a mish mash, and not everybody likes their brain getting thrown around tight curves when listening to music. They deserve the "most polarizing band in metal" award because frankly, I think they do a great job. They did what they set out to do, and I love this music a lot. I don't think I could review this album, but if somebody else who liked it reviewed it, I think that'd be an interesting comparison.
Boxcar Willy - 24.06.2012 at 21:09  
Written by demonsarising on 24.06.2012 at 16:05

I don't think I could review this album, but if somebody else who liked it reviewed it, I think that'd be an interesting comparison.

So, you're imaginary friend?

demonsarising - 25.06.2012 at 05:33  
Written by Boxcar Willy on 24.06.2012 at 21:09


So, you're imaginary friend?




Well, I said they were polarizing for a reason. There is a very devoted fanbase, its just that everybody outside of that fanbase wishes the band would just get blown up or something.
Slayer666 - 25.06.2012 at 11:33  
Written by Boxcar Willy on 24.06.2012 at 21:09

you're

It's "your".

lern 2 gremmer, n00b


Written by demonsarising on 25.06.2012 at 05:33

Well, I said they were polarizing for a reason. There is a very devoted fanbase, its just that everybody outside of that fanbase wishes the band would just get blown up or something.


To be honest, I'd love to also see a positive review of this, mostly because it would provide a nice contrast to my own review and a second opinion which is always useful, but I don't think that will happen. Mostly because I think no one but you on MS likes this stuff.

Well, Void Eater said something about liking it, but he's much better at throwing sarcastic jibes than writing reviews, so I don't know if he would be interested in writing one.

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