Rating:
3.0
An Ocean Between Us - The Failings
2012


01. Things Fall Apart
02. Live Together, Die Alone
03. Here Comes The Storm
04. From Tears
05. The Failings
06. No Turning Back
07. Empty Hands
08. Fringe
09. Jump. Push. Fall.
10. My Words And The Poison
11. The Road Not Taken


An Ocean Between Us is also the name of an As I Lay Dying disc. Which make sense considering the tunes on this sound an awful lot like what I suspect As I Lay Dying throwaways would sound like.

And yes, I mean that in the least positive kind of way possible. These guys, even at their most "metal", make As I Lay Dying sound like fucking G.G. Allin. Yeah, they're a young, amateur act and, yeah, they probably tried hard enough to make this thing not suck, but this is one of the most intensely unpleasant, unrewarding, and ugly discs I've heard... like, ever...

So consider this a public service review: These guys are a signed band, so if you ever see this album in a store, punch the shop owner in the ear and leave the store.

Sure, if you don't heed my message and try this thing out online, you'll probably notice that most of the tracks start well enough. And they do. "Here Comes The Storm", for example, kicks off with a tolerable, somewhat breezy melodic riff--one that will get you to think, if not "hey, this is pretty good", "hey, this is passable." Then, about ten or twenty seconds in, the riff unravels, the fisting orangutan noises from the vocalists commence, and the song fizzles entirely away from an approach to solidness into a sloppy bucket of shitty gray-paste and other sorts of boring things and horribleness. Then, assuming you don't quickly make the swipe at the power button on your computer to make it stop, the unbearable whiny cleans come in and ruin any morsel of hope you might have in it turning into a survivable listening experience.

Take that formula and repeat.

Then repeat again.

And again.

And again and again until the album mercifully ends.

This is the kind of embarrassing metal-based stuff that makes me want to burn my black shirts, start listening to Taylor Swift, and go skate into an AIDS tree. I'm sure these guys/lady didn't make it to torture their listeners, but I do get the impression that they threw whatever amount of dignity they might have had away to try and clutch at the whatever popularity is left in the emo-esque melodic modern metal movement, not whatever might be musically appealing about it. And it shows. So fuck this album.

Only +1 I'm comfortable giving is for the suiting album title.

Performance: -
Songwriting: -
Originality: -
Production: 7


 



Written on 20.05.2012 by
wormdrink414
Wormdrink's real name is George and he works at a convenience store in the Eugene/Springfield area.
More reviews by wormdrink414 ››



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Boxcar Willy - 20.05.2012 at 03:06  
That was one of the best reviews I've read in a while.

and a 3?

This seriously has to be bad, but I still want to hear it... My curiosity will kill me.
Promonex - 20.05.2012 at 03:22  
Fuck you! If you hadn't piqued my interest with this apparently most fitting review of yours, I wouldn't have checked out "Here Comes the Storm". I actually thought it was okay-ish... then the clean vocals kicked in. Man, I can tell you, I had an awfully hard time not to burst into laughter and wake up my girlfriend. What the hell was that? Did they teleport the pre-puberty Hanson into the present to do guest vocals??

All I can say is: my dearest condolences for having to listen to the whole thing.
Boxcar Willy - 20.05.2012 at 06:52  
Well I bit the bullet and listened to "Here Comes The Storm" and sweet jesus that was fucking bad. It sounds like a 10 year old is their vocalist.

EDIT: actually, upon further digging, the band members are my age, so kudos on the world wide record deal

EDIT x2: SUFFER!

Lit. - 20.05.2012 at 07:15  
Cover art's pretty sexy.
Uldreth - 20.05.2012 at 11:41  
These cleans are gheyer than Twilight...
silenius - 20.05.2012 at 15:38  
Written by Uldreth on 20.05.2012 at 11:41

These cleans are gheyer than Twilight...


Nothing is as gay as twilight, but this just misses by an inch, fucking SHEIT this is bad, burst out laughing when the clean vocals started, the other vocals sucks bloated anus aswell but the clean are in a different league. Worst shit ever? quite possible.
Uldreth - 20.05.2012 at 18:27  
Written by silenius on 20.05.2012 at 15:38



Worst shit ever? quite possible.

Naaaah, it isn't worse than Lulu :p

Plus, there is also this...
silenius - 20.05.2012 at 21:18  
Written by Uldreth on 20.05.2012 at 18:27

Written by silenius on 20.05.2012 at 15:38



Worst shit ever? quite possible.

Naaaah, it isn't worse than Lulu :p

Plus, there is also this...



I´ve been proven wrong it seems, thanks for the brain-rape^^
Maxx666 - 20.05.2012 at 21:31  
Fuck this shit, fuck this justin beiber metalcore crap ... why the hell is this even on metalstorm aye?? its a fucking disgrace..
Maxx666 - 20.05.2012 at 21:33  
Now i have to listen to 3 rounds of Brain Drill just to get rid of this shit from my head... damn me why the hell did i clicked the link to this page in the first place.. damn it
Void Eater - 20.05.2012 at 21:57  
People are still talking about Attack Attack in 2012? You might as well be saying, "Lol, check out this band Limp Bizkit, don't they suck?"

The band in the review is mediocre as hell, but not funny bad.
Troy Killjoy - 20.05.2012 at 23:26  
Written by Void Eater on 20.05.2012 at 21:57
People are still talking about Attack Attack in 2012? You might as well be saying, "Lol, check out this band Limp Bizkit, don't they suck?" The band in the review is mediocre as hell, but not funny bad.

I second this post.
Mr. Doctor - 20.05.2012 at 23:38  
Written by Troy Killjoy on 20.05.2012 at 23:26

Written by Void Eater on 20.05.2012 at 21:57
People are still talking about Attack Attack in 2012? You might as well be saying, "Lol, check out this band Limp Bizkit, don't they suck?" The band in the review is mediocre as hell, but not funny bad.

I second this post.


I third it... Was surprised to see the video as well. xP
Marcel Hubregtse - 20.05.2012 at 23:39  
Written by Mr. Doctor on 20.05.2012 at 23:38

Written by Troy Killjoy on 20.05.2012 at 23:26

Written by Void Eater on 20.05.2012 at 21:57
People are still talking about Attack Attack in 2012? You might as well be saying, "Lol, check out this band Limp Bizkit, don't they suck?" The band in the review is mediocre as hell, but not funny bad.

I second this post.


I third it... Was surprised to see the video as well. xP


You can't third something ffs
Troy Killjoy - 20.05.2012 at 23:40  
Written by Mr. Doctor on 20.05.2012 at 23:38
I third it...

You mean you also second it.

(Déjà vu...)
Marcel Hubregtse - 20.05.2012 at 23:41  
Written by Troy Killjoy on 20.05.2012 at 23:40

Written by Mr. Doctor on 20.05.2012 at 23:38
I third it...

You mean you also second it.

(Déjà vu...)


ninja'd
Mr. Doctor - 20.05.2012 at 23:44  
Written by Marcel Hubregtse on 20.05.2012 at 23:39
You can't third something ffs

Written by Troy Killjoy on 20.05.2012 at 23:40

Written by Mr. Doctor on 20.05.2012 at 23:38
I third it...

You mean you also second it.
(Déjà vu...)


I know guys, I wrote it that way now because I was expecting at least one of you guys to call me on it. It's like Craig with his bad french. Don't expect me to change it anytime soon.
LordFezzington - 21.05.2012 at 00:09  
Written by Marcel Hubregtse on 20.05.2012 at 23:39

Written by Mr. Doctor on 20.05.2012 at 23:38

Written by Troy Killjoy on 20.05.2012 at 23:26

Written by Void Eater on 20.05.2012 at 21:57
People are still talking about Attack Attack in 2012? You might as well be saying, "Lol, check out this band Limp Bizkit, don't they suck?" The band in the review is mediocre as hell, but not funny bad.

I second this post.


I third it... Was surprised to see the video as well. xP


You can't third something ffs

Pizza?

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