By popular, close to overwhelming demand we are hosting a Tr00 Satanic Black Metal edition of the infamous Greatest Metal Video Ever... Series. Here to take you on a journey to the world of raped goat corpses, shameless blasphemy and expressive panda make-up is your mistress of evil, Elodie Artour. Off we go!



The Black Satans - Satanic Darkness


Shot in the deepest darkest woods of Finland on a sunny summerday, The Black Satan's video has everything a black metal video needs: inverted crosses, an undisputed toughguy attitude, female slaves, evil facial expressions, partial nudity and a flag of Norway. Grimness; they're doing it right!






Reckless Tide - Kleemähendeäbte


The life of a black metal warrior sure is tough... or so this video implies. We all know those days when you wake up with tons of make-up and Hawaii shorts on, when it feels like the whole world - including that son of a bitch Superman - seems to be in your way. Add a wiseguy in a suit who has had his face painted, performing a line that could be described best as a mixture of Alphaville and HIM, whispering to a plush white tiger and an iceman trying to make a living... and what do you get? The perfect black metal video of course!






Dark Kirchensteuer - Leb' Doch Selber!


Acoustic black metal anyone? That sounds as absurd as eco spiritual black metal does, but respecting these musicians in the name of Satan is obligatory here. I bet every single black metal warrior dreams of the day he hangs himself on a forest tree with some acoustic black metal in the background, headbanging himself to death. Such an inspiring and romantic way to commit suicide... The only thing making this video somewhat ridiculous is the hippy drummer - then again, he sure as Hell fits perfectly with the band's style. And remember, the acoustic guitar - the Lord of Darkness seems to love it!






May Satan forgive me for making fun of his servants!
 
Posted: 03.10.2010 by Elodie Artour



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DerRozzengarten - 03.10.2010 at 12:44  
Three words come to mind, cvlt, tr00, krieg, ouuuuuuuuuuuuuuugh!
Cool thingies nevertheless, enjoyed most the first one, the third one was the most necro due to the old school production
Lucas - 03.10.2010 at 12:48  
Why is this one of my favourite genres again?
vezzy - 03.10.2010 at 13:01  
Now that's crunk kvlt.
Daniell - 03.10.2010 at 13:09  
Written by Lucas on 03.10.2010 at 12:48

Why is this one of my favourite genres again?


Because it yields to parody like nothing else
It's one of my favourite genres too, if that's any comfort.
Entropic Silence - 03.10.2010 at 13:35  
First one was the best - if only for the g-string.
Ellrohir - 03.10.2010 at 15:03  
Thank you for reminding me Reckless Tide...they are awesome
Got Mayhem? - 03.10.2010 at 16:25  
HAHA yes! I'd suggested The Black Satans awhile ago and I had feared they'd been passed over! Great shit
Array - 03.10.2010 at 16:52  
At time 3:11- the last video. signs overrule playing the instrument.
RavenKing - 03.10.2010 at 17:01  
Damn those bands and videos suck major ass. None of those bands are really Black Metal bands. Only a bunch of idiots turning BM in a retarded parody.
There's no way I can consider this garbage as serious Black Metal. It's just pure humoristic crap not even funny in the end. Only fucking retarded.

If you can't do something seriously, don't do it at all. Otherwise you only release pure shit.
batusay - 03.10.2010 at 17:07  
That was so fukin awesome, i don't like death or black but the first 2 sound preety good and also the videos are just ... incredible
Baz Anderson - 03.10.2010 at 17:18  
Haha, very entertaining... really great.
Ellrohir - 03.10.2010 at 17:18  
Written by RavenKing on 03.10.2010 at 17:01

If you can't do something seriously, don't do it at all.


they did serious black metal parody

and I'd suggest you to climb down from this mountaintop of trve kvlt necro grim elitism...life's being much happier down there
Vitriolic Hate - 03.10.2010 at 17:25  
Written by RavenKing on 03.10.2010 at 17:01

Damn those bands and videos suck major ass. None of those bands are really Black Metal bands. Only a bunch of idiots turning BM in a retarded parody.
There's no way I can consider this garbage as serious Black Metal. It's just pure humoristic crap not even funny in the end. Only fucking retarded.

If you can't do something seriously, don't do it at all. Otherwise you only release pure shit.

+1
Ellrohir - 03.10.2010 at 17:49  
Written by Vitriolic Hate on 03.10.2010 at 17:25

Written by RavenKing on 03.10.2010 at 17:01

Damn those bands and videos suck major ass. None of those bands are really Black Metal bands. Only a bunch of idiots turning BM in a retarded parody.
There's no way I can consider this garbage as serious Black Metal. It's just pure humoristic crap not even funny in the end. Only fucking retarded.

If you can't do something seriously, don't do it at all. Otherwise you only release pure shit.

+1

-1
Vitriolic Hate - 03.10.2010 at 18:11  
Written by Ellrohir on 03.10.2010 at 17:49

Written by Vitriolic Hate on 03.10.2010 at 17:25

Written by RavenKing on 03.10.2010 at 17:01

Damn those bands and videos suck major ass. None of those bands are really Black Metal bands. Only a bunch of idiots turning BM in a retarded parody.
There's no way I can consider this garbage as serious Black Metal. It's just pure humoristic crap not even funny in the end. Only fucking retarded.

If you can't do something seriously, don't do it at all. Otherwise you only release pure shit.

+1

-1

+666
Elodie Artour - 03.10.2010 at 19:21  
LOL

I'm glad you like the videos, guys.

@RavenKing: No one has forced you to watch these videos. I personally find them extremely hilarious and I don't fucking care whether these bands are "tr00" or not. Neither have I wanted to offend anyone. So, please, if you don't mind - let others, who enjoy them, in peace.
RavenKing - 03.10.2010 at 19:29  
Written by Elodie Artour on 03.10.2010 at 19:21

LOL

I'm glad you like the videos, guys.

@RavenKing: No one has forced you to watch these videos. I personally find them extremely hilarious and I don't fucking care whether these bands are "tr00" or not. Neither have I wanted to offend anyone. So, please, if you don't mind - let others, who enjoy them, in peace.


I you people enjoy retarded things, fine. I prefer serious art to childish garbage.
Vombatus - 03.10.2010 at 19:36  
Hahaha, great videos. Last one is epic.... Is there something more kvlt than hang yourself AND headbang at the same time ?

I'm pretty elitist for BM but sometimes it's better to take a laugh. And for haters, remember that all the parody videos you find in BM was born with (the tr00) Immortal and the best music video ever: Call of the Wintermoon
ArcanoXIII - 03.10.2010 at 19:38  
Reckless Tide rocks ! xD
Elodie Artour - 03.10.2010 at 19:48  
@RavenKing: Dude, you've used a wrong word. It's called 'hilarious.'

And if you're so damn serious, then just avoid all this 'garbage.' Just because some people wanted to create black metal parodies doesn't mean the whole genre sucks. In addition, I actually like black metal. The whole thing (this edition) was made for fun. Now, please, if you excuse me, I'm done convincing some 'serious person' in a totally UNserious thread.
RavenKing - 03.10.2010 at 19:52  
Written by Vombatus on 03.10.2010 at 19:36

I'm pretty elitist for BM but sometimes it's better to take a laugh. And for haters, remember that all the parody videos you find in BM was born with (the tr00) Immortal and the best music video ever: Call of the Wintermoon


The difference is "Call Of The Wintermoon" is a real Black Metal song (and a very good one). Those 'songs' here are musical garbage.

Also Immortal's video is really funny. The shit here is just lame.
RavenKing - 03.10.2010 at 20:00  
Written by Elodie Artour on 03.10.2010 at 19:48

@RavenKing: Dude, you've used a wrong word. It's called 'hilarious.'

And if you're so damn serious, then just avoid all this 'garbage.' Just because some people wanted to create black metal parodies doesn't mean the whole genre sucks. In addition, I actually like black metal. The whole thing (this edition) was made for fun. Now, please, if you excuse me, I'm done convincing some 'serious person' in a totally UNserious thread.


I understand that you have nothing against the genre and that you don't take those videos seriously.
It's just that, unlike me, you find this kind of stuff funny. I'm not angry at you for having started this thread. No hard feelings between us, I ensure you.

I'm not angry at anyone. My comments only expressed my contempt for such things, not anger.
Ellrohir - 03.10.2010 at 20:04  
It is so funny to see necro grim kvltists so seriously complaining about parody bands

remember one wise quote - "you cannot take anything seriously, if you cannot make fun of it"
Elodie Artour - 03.10.2010 at 20:07  
@Ellrohir: Finally someone to say something wise! Thank you!

EDIT: Yes, I do laugh my ass of at these ones.
vezzy - 03.10.2010 at 20:12  
I find it funny how he said he can't take this seriously.

Captain Obvious to the rescue!
Amonisis - 03.10.2010 at 20:14  
Reckless Tide - Kleemähendeäbte was one of the best videos of all time, it was hilarious, but the part that got me was the reference to Monty Python's Lumberjack thing. XP
King Ajax - 03.10.2010 at 20:59  
Wow, this is awesome. Thanks for posting these!
Culty - 03.10.2010 at 21:24  
Oh, how i love black metal and how easy it is to make fun of it.
Daggon - 03.10.2010 at 21:36  
When I grow up, I'm going to marry Elodie hahaha. Thanks for this... things.
Derwood - 03.10.2010 at 21:39  
The Reckless Tide video is pure awesome. The ability to laugh at ourselves is what keeps us sane.
Elodie Artour - 03.10.2010 at 22:10  
LOL

Awesome comments!

@Derwood: I totally agree with you on that one. That's why I'm tired of fanboys and 'serious' people.
@Daggon: We shall see, haha.
moe5512 - 04.10.2010 at 00:22  
You should watch the Black satans dude's other videos. They are hilarious (some of them are in finnish). he makes fun for example of black metal, finnish rock, rap, finnish english accent and so on
Thunderdrake - 04.10.2010 at 02:10  
Wow, these videos pain my nonexistent soul. Funny though. /../
Ted - 04.10.2010 at 09:44  
Ridiculous
Darkside Momo - 04.10.2010 at 13:07  
Oh My God! (or should I say Oh My Satam?) this was ridiculously great.
Moar kvlt tr00 metal fun pliz!
Ellrohir - 04.10.2010 at 13:28  
Written by vezzy on 03.10.2010 at 20:12

I find it funny how he said he can't take this seriously.

Captain Obvious to the rescue!


lol

this must be the first time, when i lol'd thanks to your post great
pyrz - 04.10.2010 at 22:20  
Written by RavenKing on 03.10.2010 at 19:52

The difference is "Call Of The Wintermoon" is a real Black Metal song (and a very good one). Those 'songs' here are musical garbage.

Also Immortal's video is really funny. The shit here is just lame.


trve. Each of Immortal's videos is funnier. These guys here are just trying too hard.
SKELETOR - 05.10.2010 at 19:56  
Aaaaaaaa what?
back to morbid angel or cannibal corpse
Akram - 10.10.2010 at 19:46  
Hilarious videos and yea black metal sucks compared with thrash and death.
Ellrohir - 10.10.2010 at 21:58  
Black metal doesnt suck...only the guys who take it (and themselves) too seriously do

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