Unholy Sermon - The Sacrificial Rite review

Reviewer:
4.8

1 user:
7

Band:	Unholy Sermon
Album:	The Sacrificial Rite
Style:	Melodic black metal, Thrash metal
Release date:	February 2011

01. The Virgin Sacrifice (Intro)
02. Demonic Call To Play
03. The Priests From Babylon
04. Crucifix In Fire
05. Bleed For The Gods Of War
06. Hamartia
07. Personifying Procrastination

Encountering some trouble writing this review?there are only so many ways to say that an album sucks--I turned to the kind persons at Dyson for help. They assisted me with the composition of the following:

I know that giving young bands shit can be a shitty thing to do. Especially when they're from a country with a metal scene the size of Sri Lanka's. But sometimes one encounters an amateur album so insultingly bland that he can't resist the urge. This is one of those cases. Unholy Sermon's The Sacrificial Rite is utterly flavorless.

The production, for starters, is dull. And not in the trve, cold sort of way either. Just dull. The vocalist's voice sounds stretched and strained. It lacks power. The keyboard intros and fills are uninteresting. The drumming is mid-paced and remains so throughout. And so forth. It's bland, lifeless mush. There's nothing extreme or risky about it. And it sucks. Almost as hard as a Dyson DC25 Multi Floor.

The album cover looks like a composite image of every other satanic melodic black metal album. Graveyard, check. Boobs, check. Pentagrams, check. Seen it all before. Which is a good indicator for the music underneath. You've probably heard it all before. A story as old as post-2nd wave melodic black metal: Amateur band copies their predecessors, adding splashes of melody randomly, thinking that, if they sound awful, they must be krieg. Which sucks. Just like the ultra-lightweight Dyson DC26.

It has to be noted, however, that there are a few solid riffs and solos on this. And that's normally enough for me. But their scarcity is annoying. The guitarist has some skill, but he seems to hesitate too much. He yields to the average performances from his band mates and lets them dominate the songs. Add to that the fact that he's all over the genre spectrum during this. When a thrash groove is developing, he kills it with some melodeath. When black metal is tremoloing its way into a fury, he backs down and plays more melodeath. Fluctuation can be good, don't get me wrong, but he doesn't have a good feel for it. Not yet at least. And that sucks. Almost as hard as a Dyson DC35 (who ever said vacuums need cords?).

In sum, Vacuum Cleaners are way more exciting than this album. Especially the Bagless ones. So, I'd advise you to not waste your time with it.

Written on 26.05.2011 by

wormdrink414

Wormdrink's real name is George and he's an American.

More reviews by wormdrink414 ››

Comments

‹‹ Back to Reviews

Comments: 43 Visited by: 271 users

Hits total: 7656 | This month: 1

Vulgaris	Dionysiaque
Prognan	Dordeduh

	Selbst Despondency Chord Progressions
	Deicide Banished By Sin
	Necrot Lifeless Birth
	Morgul Blade Heavy Metal Wraiths
	Verwoed The Mother
	Frail Body Artificial Bouquet
	The Vision Bleak Weird Tales
	Vulcano Epilogue
	Griefgod Deterioration
	Austere Beneath The Threshold

	Wait A Minute! This Isn't Metal! March 2024
	Clandestine Cuts Vol. 14 Issue #3 Awesome New Demos and EPs
	Emperor Glasgow, Scotland, 22nd March 2024
	Wait A Minute! This Isn't Metal! February 2024
	Celestial Darkness Festival 2024
	MS Awards 2023 Staff Picks!!
	Clandestine Cuts Vol. 14 Issue #2 Awesome New Demos and EPs
	Shattering Xpectations Xentrix Live In Reading

1.	My Dying Bride A Mortal Binding
2.	Týr Battle Ballads
3.	Ingested The Tide Of Death And Fractured Dreams
4.	Accept Humanoid
5.	Darkthrone It Beckons Us All......
6.	Cistvaen At Light's Demise
7.	The Vision Bleak Weird Tales
8.	Labyrinthus Stellarum Vortex Of The Worlds
9.	Necrot Lifeless Birth
10.	Blaze Of Perdition Upharsin

1.	Death Symbolic
2.	Megadeth Rust In Peace
3.	Judas Priest Painkiller
4.	Metallica Master Of Puppets
5.	Opeth Blackwater Park
6.	Metallica Ride The Lightning
7.	Black Sabbath Paranoid
8.	Iron Maiden Powerslave
9.	Death The Sound Of Perseverance
10.	Agalloch The Mantle

Doc G. Full Grown Hoser Staff Posts: 9718	Permalink 26.05.2011 - 08:47 Doc G. Full Grown Hoser Staff Posts: 9718 So which vacuum would you recommend? ---- "I got a lot of really good ideas, problem is, most of them suck." - George Carlin Loading...
wormdrink414 Elite Posts: 1295	Permalink 26.05.2011 - 08:53 wormdrink414 Elite Posts: 1295 Written by Doc G. on 26.05.2011 at 08:47 So which vacuum would you recommend? That's a tough one. I guess I'd go with a Bissell. Just to be punk rock. Dyson aint punk rock. Loading...
BitterCOld The Ancient One Admin Posts: 15251	Permalink 26.05.2011 - 08:54 BitterCOld The Ancient One Admin Posts: 15251 Yeah, i refer to our current household one as THE NOISEMAKER ... so i'm looking for quiet, yet still with some suck power. thanks in advance. nice work. ---- get the fuck off my lawn. Beer Bug Virus Spotify Playlist crafted by Nikarg and I. Feel free to tune in and add some pertinent metal tunes! Loading...
wormdrink414 Elite Posts: 1295	Permalink 26.05.2011 - 09:13 wormdrink414 Elite Posts: 1295 Written by BitterCOld on 26.05.2011 at 08:54 Yeah, i refer to our current household one as THE NOISEMAKER ... so i'm looking for quiet, yet still with some suck power. thanks in advance. nice work. Go with the DC23 for quietness. Loading...
Fat & Sassy! Elite Posts: 3857	Permalink 26.05.2011 - 09:36 Fat & Sassy! Elite Posts: 3857 "WELL IT CERTAINLY DOES SUCK." Loading...
Darkside Momo Retired Elite Posts: 9087	Permalink 26.05.2011 - 12:27 Darkside Momo Retired Elite Posts: 9087 Nice review and comments, lol'ing all over the place ---- My Author's Blog (in French) "You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you" "I've lost too many years now I'm stealing back my soul I am awake" Loading...
Milena gloom cookie Staff Posts: 4603	Permalink 26.05.2011 - 14:07 Milena gloom cookie Staff Posts: 4603 Written by Darkside Momo on 26.05.2011 at 12:27 Nice review and comments, lol'ing all over the place +1 ---- 7.0 means the album is good Loading...
Edmund Fogg Posts: 1752	Permalink 26.05.2011 - 14:46 Edmund Fogg Posts: 1752 Ah Dyson, where are you not these days? You even act as muse for metal reviews. Really original review. Nice work ---- You cannot sedate all the things you hate - MM The Observer is the source of reality - Bloom God damn it!! What did Diddy didn't do? - Satan Loading...
Marcel Hubregtse Grumpy Old Fuck Elite Posts: 40071	Permalink 26.05.2011 - 15:28 Marcel Hubregtse Grumpy Old Fuck Elite Posts: 40071 Mmm totally disagree. I find this an immensely promising album. their new track Sanatana Dharma which will be released soon as single has a lot of Sri Lankan influences in it. ---- Member of the true crusade against European Flower Metal Yesterday is dead and gone, tomorrow is out of sight Dawn Crosby (r.i.p.) 05.04.1963 - 15.12.1996 Loading...
Marcel Hubregtse Grumpy Old Fuck Elite Posts: 40071	Permalink 26.05.2011 - 15:53 Marcel Hubregtse Grumpy Old Fuck Elite Posts: 40071 Oh btw, nicely and well-written review. ---- Member of the true crusade against European Flower Metal Yesterday is dead and gone, tomorrow is out of sight Dawn Crosby (r.i.p.) 05.04.1963 - 15.12.1996 Loading...
bluegreengod Account deleted	Permalink 26.05.2011 - 20:19 bluegreengod Account deleted I listened to some of this and did not like it at all with the production being the biggest problem. To say that it sucks and to the point of vacuum references seems a stretch, though... try turning on the radio anywhere in america and you'll hear stuff truly deserving of dyson talk. Loading...
Tranquillizer Account deleted	Permalink 26.05.2011 - 21:14 Tranquillizer Account deleted By merely looking at their band name/album title/tracklist I get the feeling that this is some Z-grade band, trying to the most kvlt band in the whole vnholy grim vniverse ov death . I would like to be proven wrong, but doubt I will . Loading...
Thryce Retired Staff Elite Posts: 4346	Permalink 26.05.2011 - 22:24 Thryce Retired Staff Elite Posts: 4346 Quote: there are only so many ways to say that an album sucks Challenge accepted! This album sucks harder than a toothless hooker. This album sucks harder than a vampire from Twilight. This album sucks harder than Twilight. This album sucks harder than an anorexic on a milkshake straw. This album sucks harder than a black hole at a Smurf convention. This album sucks harder than Gaahl in his as-yet-unreleased sex tape (oh, it's coming). This album sucks harder than K7 at a spelling bee. The point is: good review! ---- Your favorite band sucks. Loading...
wormdrink414 Elite Posts: 1295	Permalink 26.05.2011 - 22:31 wormdrink414 Elite Posts: 1295 Written by Marcel Hubregtse on 26.05.2011 at 15:28 Mmm totally disagree. I find this an immensely promising album. I pretty much thought the same when I first put it on (the first 3-4 minutes are decent), but around the third or fourth listen I couldn't take any more of it. It could definitely have benefited from a little more polish. Not necessarily post-production glitter or anything, but some riff work, some re-thinking of the vocal parts, etc. But, then again, this is strictly eye-m-oh. Written by Thryce on 26.05.2011 at 22:24 This album sucks harder than a black hole at a Smurf convention. Too soon, dude. Loading...
Marcel Hubregtse Grumpy Old Fuck Elite Posts: 40071	Permalink 26.05.2011 - 23:30 Marcel Hubregtse Grumpy Old Fuck Elite Posts: 40071 IZ think I listened to thid salbum about 20 time now and tbh it keeps on growing. Clearly this is a case of love it or hate it. Btw check out the review on lordsofmetal on June 2 for a totally different perspective on this ;X ---- Member of the true crusade against European Flower Metal Yesterday is dead and gone, tomorrow is out of sight Dawn Crosby (r.i.p.) 05.04.1963 - 15.12.1996 Loading...
Pyramid God Posts: 184	Permalink 27.05.2011 - 00:11 Pyramid God Posts: 184 The vocals are distractingly poor. Loading...
Mikrokosmos Account deleted	Permalink 27.05.2011 - 04:14 Mikrokosmos Account deleted Written by Doc G. on 26.05.2011 at 08:47 So which vacuum would you recommend? I saw (in Germany) one called Dirt Devil. I was amazed by the epicness. Loading...
Fat & Sassy! Elite Posts: 3857	Permalink 27.05.2011 - 06:12 Fat & Sassy! Elite Posts: 3857 Written by Thryce on 26.05.2011 at 22:24 This album sucks harder than K7 at a spelling bee. Impossible. Loading...
TheLongPig Posts: 1	Permalink 27.05.2011 - 19:19 TheLongPig Posts: 1 Ok to put it in a nutshell, this review seems pretty unprofessional not to mention poorly researched as well. One look at the genre which the band claims they are will tell you that they do indeed switch around and mingle in death, black, melodic and thrash metal. Also to say it sucks as hard as a vacuum cleaner is not only overly dramatic, but also extremely immature and unprofessional. If you didn't like it fine, that's one thing. But it's something else for most of the 'substance' in this supposed 'critique' of a bands work contained your little quips about vacuum cleaners. There was little- or more like no constructive criticism at all. It was like a 12 year old grasping at the few 'witty' lines he could think of in order to make this 'entertaining'. Bottom line I liked it. I guess like one of the afore mentioned comments said it must be a love it or hate it thing. Despite that the music is no way as shitty as you made it out to be. Loading...
Fat & Sassy! Elite Posts: 3857	Permalink 27.05.2011 - 23:05 Fat & Sassy! Elite Posts: 3857 Written by TheLongPig on 27.05.2011 at 19:19 There was little- or more like no constructive criticism at all. It was like a 12 year old grasping at the few 'witty' lines he could think of in order to make this 'entertaining'. I take it you didn't read the review? TIME TO PRACTICALLY REPOST THIS WHOLE REVIEW. "The production, for starters, is dull. And not in the trve, cold sort of way either. Just dull. The vocalist's voice sounds stretched and strained. It lacks power. The keyboard intros and fills are uninteresting. The drumming is mid-paced and remains so throughout. And so forth. It's bland, lifeless mush." "It has to be noted, however, that there are a few solid riffs and solos on this. And that's normally enough for me. But their scarcity is annoying. The guitarist has some skill, but he seems to hesitate too much. He yields to the average performances from his band mates and lets them dominate the songs. Add to that the fact that he's all over the genre spectrum during this. When a thrash groove is developing, he kills it with some melodeath. When black metal is tremoloing its way into a fury, he backs down and plays more melodeath. Fluctuation can be good, don't get me wrong, but he doesn't have a good feel for it." From what I've heard of their songs on MySpace, it is described almost perfectly. Written by TheLongPig on 27.05.2011 at 19:19 Bottom line I liked it. And god help the person who doesn't. Loading...
!J.O.O.E.! Account deleted	Permalink 27.05.2011 - 23:27 !J.O.O.E.! Account deleted I haven't listened to this album but I'm not entirely unsympathetic to TheLongPigs comments. I did kinda go away from this review thinking more about vacuum cleaners than whatever album this was again. I'm all for amusing reviews but when a record becomes a showcase for a one-lined joke stretched ad infinitum one kinda wonders where the focus was originally. That being said it's clear people were entertained by this and I'm certainly someone who believes it's vital for a review to be entertaining, I''m just not one where critiquing takes a back seat. I'm gonna put this review down to fine-tuning as it's a little on the soggy side for my tastes but I appreciate where it was intended to go. Needless to say I won't be checking this out. Loading...
Fat & Sassy! Elite Posts: 3857	Permalink 27.05.2011 - 23:33 Fat & Sassy! Elite Posts: 3857 Written by Guest on 27.05.2011 at 23:27 I''m just not one where critiquing takes a back seat. I'm gonna put this review down to fine-tuning as it's a little on the soggy side for my tastes but I appreciate where it was intended to go. Personally, I did not walk away from it feeling like one aspect of the review dominated more than the other. I didn't think that the critique took a back seat, more like it was driving and the humor was rockin' in the passenger seat, entertaining not only the driver, but all the people in the car LIKE THE GOOD FRIEND HE IS. Loading...
!J.O.O.E.! Account deleted	Permalink 27.05.2011 - 23:39 !J.O.O.E.! Account deleted Written by Fat & Sassy! on 27.05.2011 at 23:33 Personally, I did not walk away from it feeling like one aspect of the review dominated more than the other. I didn't think that the critique took a back seat, more like it was driving and the humor was rockin' in the passenger seat, entertaining not only the driver, but all the people in the car LIKE THE GOOD FRIEND HE IS. Yeah but if I tied a piece of string to my wang and spun it around you'd probably think that was hilarious! I don't know what point I'm trying to make there. Loading...
Fat & Sassy! Elite Posts: 3857	Permalink 27.05.2011 - 23:43 Fat & Sassy! Elite Posts: 3857 Written by Guest on 27.05.2011 at 23:39 Yeah but if I tied a piece of string to my wang and spun it around you'd probably think that was hilarious! I don't know what point I'm trying to make there. That... you want me to want you? D: Loading...
!J.O.O.E.! Account deleted	Permalink 27.05.2011 - 23:45 !J.O.O.E.! Account deleted Written by Fat & Sassy! on 27.05.2011 at 23:43 Written by Guest on 27.05.2011 at 23:39 Yeah but if I tied a piece of string to my wang and spun it around you'd probably think that was hilarious! I don't know what point I'm trying to make there. That... you want me to want you? D: That's why I'm putting a fish hook on the end of the string. Your Fat/Sassyness will be mine any way I can get it. Loading...
Fat & Sassy! Elite Posts: 3857	Permalink 27.05.2011 - 23:49 Fat & Sassy! Elite Posts: 3857 Written by Guest on 27.05.2011 at 23:45 That's why I'm putting a fish hook on the end of the string. Your Fat/Sassyness will be mine any way I can get it. You sure do know how to flatter a girl, dude. =3 Loading...
Troy Killjoy perfunctionist Staff Posts: 21306	Permalink 28.05.2011 - 00:39 Troy Killjoy perfunctionist Staff Posts: 21306 Written by Guest on 27.05.2011 at 23:27 I haven't listened to this album but I'm not entirely unsympathetic to TheLongPigs comments. I did kinda go away from this review thinking more about vacuum cleaners than whatever album this was again. I'm all for amusing reviews but when a record becomes a showcase for a one-lined joke stretched ad infinitum one kinda wonders where the focus was originally. That being said it's clear people were entertained by this and I'm certainly someone who believes it's vital for a review to be entertaining, I''m just not one where critiquing takes a back seat. I'm gonna put this review down to fine-tuning as it's a little on the soggy side for my tastes but I appreciate where it was intended to go. Needless to say I won't be checking this out. My thoughts exactly. Also, I believe this is the first time we've seen completely eye-to-eye. ---- "Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools because they have to say something." Loading...
!J.O.O.E.! Account deleted	Permalink 28.05.2011 - 00:48 !J.O.O.E.! Account deleted Written by Troy Killjoy on 28.05.2011 at 00:39 My thoughts exactly. Also, I believe this is the first time we've seen completely eye-to-eye. I think that may be the case I'm not really sure what to do now... I'm scared Troy. Do I hug you or kiss you or what? Loading...
Troy Killjoy perfunctionist Staff Posts: 21306	Permalink 28.05.2011 - 00:54 Troy Killjoy perfunctionist Staff Posts: 21306 Written by Guest on 28.05.2011 at 00:48 I think that may be the case I'm not really sure what to do now... I'm scared Troy. Do I hug you or kiss you or what? I believe wang-spinning is in order, although this review thread has already spiraled off-topic enough without me. ---- "Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools because they have to say something." Loading...
unholysermon Posts: 2	Permalink 01.06.2011 - 00:08 unholysermon Posts: 2 This Same album was Rated 83/100 By Lords Of Metal http://www.lordsofmetal.nl/showreview.php?id=19136&lang=en and A+ by the sunday leader magazine so i would suggest you guys to give our music a listen and then judge us \m/ and thanks George (wormdrink414) for the Review Loading...